Slice (2018)

Director: Austin Vesely
Stars: Zazie Beetz, Hannibal Buress, Joe Keery
Runtime: 83 minutes

Synopsis: A movie about a murder, a pizza place, ghosts, witches, and werewolves.

• Performances: 6/10

Why? For what the movie was trying to be, the actors did a pretty okay job. They didn't take themselves nor the material too seriously. A couple of characters were maybe too over the top, but that's nothing compared to the issues I had with the rest of the movie.

• Screenplay: 2/10

Why? What the hell was that, A24? I've been a big fan of the studio's projects for a while now, and I don't think I ever genuinely disliked one of their movies ever before. "Slice" has the unfortunate honor of being the first. I've got nothing against self-aware movies with ridiculous plots who don't take themselves too seriously. In fact, most of the time I quite enjoy them. But what makes them so enjoyable and charming is how natural and organic the end product turns out to be ("Black Dynamite" is a perfect example of a good self-awarely bad comedy). Every scene in "Slice", on the other hand, felt forced and written by a 6-year-old actually trying to write a good story. The comedy did not land, I couldn't find one single character to root for, and the story was uninteresting and all over the place. I'd recommend saving your money and buying an actual pizza slice. It'll probably have a lot more flavor. 

• Special Effects: 2/10

Why? Only featured in the messy final act, they were terrible. Even for a movie trying to bring a B movie atmosphere to it.

• Costumes/Makeup: 2/10

Why? Some people will call it intentionally bad, I'm calling it just plain lazy.

• Editing: 3/10

Why? Another reason why this movie did not work at all for me was its pacing. The film went from 0 to 100 and vice versa in a matter of seconds, which was really annoying.

• Cinematography: 4/10

Why? Bad, but not unbearably bad. It was pretty inconsistent in my opinion, and could've done a better job giving the movie its general B atmosphere.

• Score/Soundtrack: 3/10

Why? Cheesy and cringeworthy. 

FINAL GRADE: 3/10